why aren't you a hypochondriac?

Behold! I have had a thought.

Hi!

Hello! As paying subscribers know, there are some verrrrry exciting things coming to this newsletter soon. I won't be discussing them quite yet though, partially because I'm about to set off for Rome to celebrate my mum's 60th - wahoo! - and partially because I decided to create that poll on a whim and now I actually have to think about what That Big Project will look like.

That last bit's fine, by the way. I love doing things on a whim. I actually booked my tickets for my first five-week jaunt to New York before having even applied for my work visa, and that turned out alright. Just give me a couple of weeks to turn my mad scheming into something coherent and we'll be grand.

In the meantime! I've been reading fun things on the internet recently. I will now tell you about them.

1. "The P_rnhub Literary Supplement"

This collection of pieces was apparently inspired by "Supreme Court Justice Alito's question about whether P_rnhub includes highbrow literary content", which I just think is the best possible reason to assemble a zine. I've not read all the bits yet but enjoyed the ones I did, and am just all in favour of silly but clever smut being published online, so here we are. Also sorry for that weird infantilising spelling but apparently my newsletter sometimes gets into people's spam folders, and I didn't want that to happen again.

2. Cockney Yiddish: how two languages influenced each other in London’s East End

Does what it says on the tin! Love history, love languages, love London, love anything that ties all three together. Simple as.

3. "Go bard or go home! Why are UK clubs going medieval?"

Because I'm 33 going on 58 I've no interest whatsoever in going clubbing/generally being out of the house after midnight, but this feature on "bardcore" is a true delight. The quotes are so good. My favourite one was: “I think people love the excuse to get dressed up and be silly. Someone once brought a little flute and jammed along to the DJ". A little flute! Marvellous.

That is all for now! Thanking you kindly.

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A column

Today it's breasts, cervix and stomach. A few weeks ago, it was brain and rectum. For a little while I experimented with throat and nose, but I didn't end up enjoying them as much as the other ones. Maybe I'll get back to them later, once I've found a better angle.

Every day I wake up and I think about a part of my body which I have decided has cancer. Well, most days. Sometimes it takes me until the afternoon to remember that I have a body, and that it is fallible. As a treat, I occasionally wait until bedtime, with the lights off, to ponder my wet, unreliable sack of flesh.